


Dining With Your Enemy

by three_days_late



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - Spies & Secret Agents, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-28
Updated: 2016-07-28
Packaged: 2018-07-27 08:33:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7611064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/three_days_late/pseuds/three_days_late
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>CIA Agent Jones is working with MI6 to track down and stop a group aiming for the crown jewels. On an unrelated note, he also has a date later.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dining With Your Enemy

**Author's Note:**

> I've just decided it's rare pair Thrusday so Happy Rare Pair Thursday! 
> 
> This was for a rare pair event on tumblr a few years ago. The prompt was "first dates," I believe. I think I wrote this like, the day after I visited the Tower of London, which should explain the setting.

 

Alfred Jones, top secret super spy currently on loan to the MI6 from the CIA for a very important mission involving Soviet counter-spies, sensitive intelligence, and the fate of the world, was bored.

" _Stop yawning!"_ a voice, his partner for this mission, top MI6 operative who wasn't nearly as good as Alfred but made a decent sidekick, Arthur Kirkland, snapped in his earpiece, " _You have a mission to complete._ "

"But it's so boring," Alfred sighed and leaned against the wall, out of sight of the oncoming crowds, "who's going to steal some stupid jewels anyway?"

" _They are the crown jewels of the royal family and we've already received intelligence that someone is trying to steal them._ "

"Oh sorry, I should have phrased that better," Alfred glanced back at the people admiring the jewels, all tourists, no active threats, "What I meant was, why would anyone _want_ to steal some stupid jewels?"

" _Royal. Family's. Jewels. They have extraordinary monetary value, among other things_."

"Who would you sell them to? Anyone you would sell them to wouldn't risk buying them since they're obviously stolen," he glanced at his watch, 4:30 PM, "You wouldn't be able to show them off since again, everyone would know you stole them, so why steal them."

" _To prove that you could. To shame the royal family. To point out the holes in the current security system. For reasons that the brilliant America cannot possibly conceive."_

Yes, they had codenames, absolutely necessary in protecting their identities from their enemies. Alfred had wanted to go with "Hero and Eyebrows," but Arthur was lame and had insisted they simply go with their nationalities instead.

Alfred glanced over the crowd again. More tourists, girl with short blonde hair in sunglasses and her shaking younger brother were approaching the center case, "Am I going to stay here much longer? I've got a date later."

" _Oh yes, because nothing will make this job better than being stuck listening to your sexual exploits all morning._ "

"Th-this will only be our first date!" Alfred blushed and did another scan of the room, Blondie and her brother now near the back wall, nothing out of the ordinary, "No one said anything about…more."

" _Sometimes I forget how completely virgin you are."_

His blush deepened as he looked down at his watch again, 4:33 PM, "Just because prefer to take my time to develop a relationship to a certain level before partaking in certain activities does not mean I'm a virgin."

" _If you say so._ "

Alfred could hear that condescending smirk that was plastered on his face, but before he could nail out a witty response he had to scan over the crowd again and found that they were all gone, guards and all. Only Blondie and her brother remained, looking very intently at the jewels in the center case.

"England, something's going down in the Jewel House. How many people have left in the past minute?"

" _No one has left in the past five minutes,_ " came the speedy response, " _Is everything alright in there?"_

"Two people, a blonde woman and a younger man who've been looking at the crown and stuff for the past few – and yeah, she's pulling out knives." The woman knocked out the cameras with her knives just as the man smashed the glass and started grabbing the crowns, looking at them closely.

" _Well go and stop them, lead them out the back if you can, and I'll meet you there. Don't do anything too stupid."_

"Got it," Alfred reached into his arm holster and pulled out his pistol, "And I never do anything stupid."

Arthur didn't bother to respond to that, so Alfred lowered his own sunglasses and sidled along the wall until he was even with the thieves. He had his gun pointed at them just as the woman noticed him and raised her knife, defensively stepping in front of him.

"Well, fancy meeting you here," Alfred grinned his best Hollywood smile as he stared her down, "Doing some shopping I suppose?"

The man was startled, twitching in reflex to Alfred's voice and tossed the crown he was holding several feet in the air, managing to catch it before it hit the ground. He quickly replaced it as if that would cancel out his crime and turned to face Alfred, back pressed up against the broken case.

"Finish the job!" the woman barked, tip of her knife pointed directly at Alfred's heart, never wavering as she stepped forward, "I'll take care of him."

Alfred smirked and stepped away from the wall as the two circled around the room. To see what would happen, he took aim and fired at the man, but she read his move and was back by his side in a flash to deflect the bullet with her knife blade. Alfred gave an impressed whistle.

" _Stop flirting and do your job_." The voice in his ear reprimanded, " _I'm at the back now."_

Alfred took a step forward only to jump three backwards as a knife flew at him. Blondie had another in her hand ready to go by the time he recovered and charged forward, shooting at her. She deflected his bullets as best she could, but Alfred was relentless, forcing her to back up until she eventually hit the wall. Alfred rushed forward, pointing the gun at her temple as she raised her knife to his throat, a stalemate.

"Got it," he heard the man shout behind him, "Let's go."

She smiled at Alfred right before shoving a knee hard into his stomach. As he doubled over, she kicked at his wrist, disarming him and taking his gun, and backhanded him hard with it, effectively stunning him as the two made their escape.

Alfred took a moment to recover, snatched his gun up from where she had dropped it, and chased them out the back door, hoping Arthur had at least managed to slow them down. He emerged from the Jewel House to find that the guards had the tourists off to one side, Arthur had the man pinned to the ground and was in the process of cuffing him, and the woman was escaping running towards the White Tower, bag with the crown in it tossed over her shoulder. Alfred holstered his weapon, he would never hear the end of it if he damaged any part of the Tower, and started running after her.

She was fast and blended into the crowds of tourists paying more attention to Arthur and his catch, easily slipping by the guards and startling some ravens until Alfred caught up with her near Traitor's Gate.

"It's no use," he held out his hand as she turned, pressing her back against the fence, "Just hand over the crown and turn yourself in; it'll be easier on you this way."

She sneered and clutched the bag closer, "I doubt that's true. My brother needs this, it's very important."

Alfred frowned and moved his hand to the holster in his jacket, "Sorry Ma'am, normally I'd love to chat about these things, but I've gotta be somewhere tonight."

"As do I," she put her hands on the fence and flipped herself on it into a handstand, "This has been fun, Mr. America, but I really must be off." She crouched down and flipped into the air, landing perfectly on the roof of the Gate before dashing across it.

Alfred cursed and ran as fast as he could to the side entrance. He watched as she hit the cobblestones on the other side and bolt for the river. He chased her, firing off a few shots and startling some of the people, grazing her arm he was sure, but it didn't slow her down any as she dived off the edge and into the river, leaving Alfred standing there frustrated about her get away.

He had shed is jacket and ripped off his sunglasses, fully prepared to dive in after her, but a hand on his shoulder stopped him.

"See, this is what I meant by don't do something stupid," Arthur sighed and pulled him away from the edge, "She got away, didn't she?"

"She wouldn't if you would just let me go after her," Alfred tried to fight him off and jump in after her, but Arthur's grip was like steel.

"Yes jumping into the Thames in the middle of February is one of those stupid things I want you to avoid," Arthur yanked him back onto the cobblestones where he stopped his struggling, "Don't worry I have people patrolling the river. She won't get far."

"But England, I need to-"

"Besides," he raised one of his impossibly large eyebrows, "Didn't you have a date at five?"

Alfred's eyes went wide as he glanced at his watch, 5:03 PM. Natalia was not going to be happy.

* * *

Natalia had just sat down and quickly ran a brush through her hair when she spotted Alfred entering the restaurant. Quickly she shoved the make-up and hair supplies scattered on the table into her purse as he waved at her and came over. She remembered at the last second that she was supposed to have been waiting her for him for twenty minutes and put on her best scowl.

"Hey, sorry I'm a bit late," he sheepishly grinned as he sat down across from her, "some things came up at work."

"Yes, well," she tapped her foot against the table leg, making sure all the excess mud from the river was off it, "considering how long you've begged me for this date, it is rather surprising that you showed up late for it."

"I really did want to be here on time," he put his head in his hand and pouted, "I just got held up… hey what happened to your arm?"

Natalia pulled her sleeve down over the bandages, hoping he wouldn't notice that they were wet and ask about that as well, and shrugged, "Just had an unpleasant encounter with a coffee machine, that's all."

"Are you okay?" The concern in his eyes was obvious and touching, and she had to turned away, slight blush on her cheeks.

"Yes, I'm fine. No need to dwell on it," she dismissed the topic and opened a menu, relieved when he followed suit.

Alfred was far too innocent, far too caring to know about her real line of work, she decided as she kicked her purse farther under her chair, the crown rattling inside it.


End file.
